I CAN'T STOP LOVING YOU [Episode 19 - 21]

 I CAN'T  STOP LOVING YOU

                                            Episode 19

"I have to do this, for the sake of my peace that you will be happy without me."

"I am sorry. I want you to live a long life."

"I have to do this."

"I love you."

His words keep ringing in my head. The look on his face when he said I love you as he left keeps coming back to me.

I won't let him leave me and our relationship like this.

Never! He can't just walk away from me as he pleases.

I am a part of this relationship too. It's a two way street.

With determination, I walk into his office. He is not here yet.

Going to his table, I set everything in place, his files, notepad, pens and a glass of water.

As I set his table, my past memories come back.

Everything is clear now. Then I remember how I behaved in front of him these past few months when I don't remember him.

I offered him coffee, I called him the Handsome Man, I dumped water on him and all these other silly things.

Oh God! I was even asking him who his ex-girlfriend was!

I was jealous of myself! I sound like an idiot when I think about that.

I made a fool of myself in front of him all these weeks.

Honestly, I don't feel that embarrassed also, because it is My Dalton who saw me do all these things.

Then I remember how he gets suddenly cold to me.

He was trying to keep me away by being near me.

Oh Baby! Why are you doing this?! I remember how he held me close as I cried in the conference room when we talked about the sexual harassment in the company.

I remember how he spoke rudely to me when I was in his office once to apologize.

Oh and the menu card I used to hid from him.

What was I thinking?!

He took care of me every time something happened like the time I stepped on a glass and the time I fainted and woke up in his lap.

He says he is the danger to me when it's the opposite.

Opening his table drawer, I take his file to put it in, but I found a file with my name.

What is this? What surprised me is not that he had a file on my name, but why would he need one.

He is with me every walking second. I pull it out and put it on the table.

Opening it, I see my medical reports, some pictures of me taken before I joined the company.

He had me followed? There are some security papers as well.

Did he assign security on me?

I just stare at the file. There is everything about me in here.

He is not away from me even before I started working here.

Dalton.

My heart swells with warmth. He can't do all this and leave me.

I will do anything it takes to stop him! Closing the file, I keep it back in his drawer.

Just as I close the drawer, the door opens and in walks The Handsome Man.

Warmth spreads over my body as I see him walk in.

My Handsome Man. He looks up and our eyes meet. The surprise is clear in his eyes.

That's right! You thought I would just let you leave me?

I realize how psycho that sounds, but he is the real psycho here.

He is the one breaking our relationship and breaking both of our hearts.

"Good morning, Mr. Bryant!" I greet him as I fold my hands near my chest. A smirk is surely playing on my face.

"Clara." He seems to be coming out of shock. Arh!

It was a completely different feeling hearing him call my name before and after regaining my memories, both in a good way.

He says my name with such love that my heart is melting and I want to kneel and do whatever he says.

He comes to me in three long strides. "What are you doing here?

Did they discharge you already? How are you feeling?"

"Oh, so much concern for your ex-girlfriend." I have to say that sassily.

The hurt is clear in his eyes. We both know we both love each other and the break up is because he wants to protect me from himself.

No matter how stupid it sounds, that is the situation.

I shouldn't have been rude. "I am sorry." There is a pause before I speak. I put my hand on his chest, like I used

to do before. "It was rude of me."

"It's okay." He takes my other hand in his, just like he used to do.

Oh God! How can he part when he remembers everything? "How are you?" I give him a smile.

"I am fine. The doctors said everything is good and they sent me home yesterday."

"But you don't need to come to the office. You should be resting."

"How can I rest when I got to know that you are leaving in a week?"

I can't rest! All I can think about is how to bring you back to your senses!

"Who told you that?" He asks. I don't want to throw William under the bus now.

I pull away from him, but let him hold my hand.

"I saw your schedule." I lie. He sighs.

"William told you." He figures out. Shit!

"Why?" I have to know.

"Why, what?" He looks genuinely confused.

"Is it not enough that you broke up with me that you want to go so far away from me?"

My heart is aching. He looks at me silently like he can't bring himself to speak.

He looks at me like he is in pain.

"Is that a question an ex-girlfriend is supposed to ask?"

"I will kill you, if you mock me right now." He smiles at my threat.

I would have been flattered by that smile if it was any other time, but not now.

"Who breaks up like that, huh? You come into my life whenever you want and leave whenever you want?

Who gave you the permission to play with my heart?"

"Cara." He whispers as he pulls me close by my waist.

Oh, his hand on my waist feels so good! His arms are my home!

He looks into my eyes. I stare back into his. When I used to do that before, I used to fear that he might know that I like him, that I like my boss, but now... there is not fear.

Three is just pure love and longing. "I love you." Fuc"*! My heart!

"Stop! Stop it! Stop saying that if you are going to leave!" I try to pull away, but his hold is tight.

"I wanted to say that to you every time you walked in here,

I wanted to say that when I had you in my lap when you fainted in your cabin, I wanted to say that to you when you bought me coffee... Fuck!

I wanted to tell you that every day morning when you came and dictated me my schedule."

My hands instinctively go around his neck. "I wanted to tell you... that I love you."

"Martin!" Tears gather in my eyes. Why does he do this to my heart?! Why! "I hate you!"

I love you too, you stupid fool! I hug him to hide my tears and I hug him tightly. He does the same.

"I know." He whispers. He presses his lips against the top of my head.

I savor this sweet moment of being in arms. Pulling away I look at him.

"Give me your phone." I demand and he obeys. He pulls the phone out of his pocket and places it on my now extended palm.

Taking my phone that I placed on his table while cleaning, I dial his number. MD.

It rings and a picture of us both appears on his phone with my contact name.

CM. Cara Mia. I look up at him and he looks at me not understanding what I am doing.

"What happened?"

I bite my lip and think about how to say it. "I... I always had this contact on my phone and I wondered who it was.

I know it is you now, but I just wanted to... I don't know." I trail off. I want to reassure myself.

"I understand." He says.

"I once called on this number and you picked up but you didn't answer."

He nods. "I didn't know if you called me because you remember who I was or you accidentally dialed it.

I was too shocked and happy to see your name on phone when you called." I stay silent as he speaks.

"You called me with this number a few days ago."

"I did. I accidentally dialed your number from my personal number.

That's why I didn't speak then too." I nod my head at his response.

"You saved my name as Cara Mia?" He looks at me weirdly. "What?" I ask. Why is he looking at me like that?

"No. You saved it." I stare him in surprise. I did? "You said it rhymes with the way you saved my contact, MD." He explains.

"Oh." I wonder.

"You don't remember everything?" He asks.

"I have gaps in my memory." I have been trying to recollect everything from the beginning, but some things are like puzzles.

"What?"

"Yes. The doctor said that it's normal and that slowly I will gain all the memories back."

He doesn't seem convinced, but he nods. "Okay." I give him his phone back.

"Now give me the ring." I ask. I took it off his hand when he wanted to leave me in the hospital, but he took it back as he left.

"Clara, don't." His voice sounds like he in pain.

"I will give it back. I just want to... confirm something.

" He looks at me for a second before giving me the ring.

I check the inside of the ring and the marking is there like I saw in my vision or memory.

I love you. It is engraved inside the ring as I saw in my memory.

I look up at him. "What is it?" He asks. I shake my head.

"I just... When I fainted in my cabin and woke up in your lap..." He urges me to continue.

"I regained the memory of giving you this ring."

"What?"

"Yes, but didn't know who the woman was in my memory.

I thought I was imagining things." He smiles down at me.

"Here." I offer to put the ring on his finger. He happily gives his hand.

Slipping the ring on his finger, I stare at it for a second before letting his hand go.

"I will transfer you back to the HR department." He says and I look at him.

"No. I want to work here."

"Clara. You should not-"

"You might have a say in our relationship, but you can't do that to my professional life."

I stand stubborn. If I have to bring him to his senses, I have to be strong.

Although I know that he is already meddling in my professional life since the very beginning of our relationship two years ago when I first started working under him.

We started mixing personal and professional long ago.

"But-"

"I am going to work as a personal assistant for my next boss."

He looks away as I say it. Now that he is boiling, I just have to add fire to it.

I have to become the devil. "Who knows, now that I am single."

He immediately looks at me knowing what I am about to say. His eyes are turning red already.

I know you too well, Baby. "Maybe..." I trail off. Ew. I can't bring myself to say it.

"Maybe, what?" He is almost daring me to complete the sentence.

Now, I am determined. I meet his eyes as if challenging him.

"Maybe I will fall in love with hi-m Dalton!" Before I can even finish the sentence, he flips the chair beside him.

It falls and slides across the large room. It's a good thing that only we are in this office.

He is angry. Angrier than I expected. I bite my lip.

My heart starts racing. He looks at me. Angry eyes looking back into mine.

I am not scared though. I know he wouldn't hurt me. He takes a minute to cool down.

He comes to me and caresses my cheek. "It will be hard for me to accept that you will move on and fall in love with someone else as time goes by.

"I laugh internally. He is a fool if he thinks that. I can only love you.

I want to say that out loud. "But I will accept it. I have to.

" He moves closer and I just want to pull him to me. "Provoke me all you want, Cara."

He leans down and kisses my cheek, not sensually, but with love. "I will be provoked." I look at him in surprise.

Is he giving in so easily?

Only you have that power. I will be provoked till this week ends."

My heart clenches at his works. He will be gone after that.

No! "Play all the games you want to play with me.

But I have made my decision." His voice soft with love.

Our noses are touching as he speaks. Anger courses through me as I hear him say that.

"You fool!" Tears are threatening to pool in my eyes.

"You stupid!" I can't hold back. He looks apologetic.

"How can you?" He looks away like he is not able to see the pain my eyes.

"You know what you are?" He looks back at me. "A coward!" I say the words angrily.

"Cara-"

"You run away from love, you are running away from the person you love and the person who loves you."

"I am not running away. I am leaving to protect-"

"To protect me from you?" He just stares at me as I say that. "You are absurd and you will see that too."

"It is because I love you that I have to leave." Now tears are in my eyes.

"You love me?" He looks offended at my question.

"You know I do."

"Then stay." He shakes his head. "Stay and let's fight this together."

"I want to, I want to fight everything in life together with you. But, if we are together, you might not even be..." He trails of not wanting to complete."

"Alive?" I ask.

"Cara, how can I fight anything knowing that you are not in this world because of me? How can I fight anything without you?"

"I don't know, you tell me. Because you are planning on leaving me. So you must have figured it out." I feel angry.

"Cara." He looks like my words are causing him pain.

Well, he is causing me pain too! Not that I want to hurt him, but he has to see the truth, he needs to.

"I will feel better knowing you are not in danger because of me. That's worth fighting for."

I let out a laugh like I am crazy. I put my face in my palms to cool myself down.

"Cara Mia." He whispers softly, pulling my hands away from my face.

I look at him and meet his eyes, staring into them as I calm myself.

This man... This man that I deeply love has become so selfless that he nearly looks selfish.

But I love this man. He is my man. My Handsome Man.

He pulls me in for a hug. I put my arms around him without holding back.

I need to recharge myself to fight with him for this whole week and this... being in his arms helps me recharge.

I will have to be patient with him. I will have to fight with him and I have to make him see things clearly.

He places a kiss on my head and lingers his lips there for a second.

I close my eyes as I feel relaxed. He can't leave me. At least for this, I have to keep him here, to just hug him like this whenever I want to.

He says he has to leave and here he is, holding me with love.

We fight to be together and here we are together.

What a strange thing this love is?

I pull away and look at him. I feel recharged, but I still want to stay in his arms.

He looks at me like he doesn't want me to go. Yet he is the one that's wanting to leave.

"You are going to stay stubborn aren't you?"

"I have to." His words seem almost forced. I nod my head at him.

"You know I am much more stubborn than you are."

I state and he gives me a small smile as he nods his head.

"Your morning meeting will start at ten O'clock. I will mail you the details."

I say in my professional voice. He looks at me in surprise because of my sudden change in behavior.

The fight has just began!

                                               Episode 20

"I don't understand how you drink it." The sting of the hot coffee is fresh on my lips.

I set the cup of black coffee down beside him as he types away on his computer.

He takes the cup and leans back in his chair before taking a sip from the cup.

He looks stressed out. There are circles under his eyes and his hair is dishelved.

The tie around his neck is loosened. He has been working all day.

"Then why do you taste it every time?" He asks as he looks at me.

I shrug and sit on top of his work table, crossing my legs. It feels like we are back to us.

But I know we are not. I lean forward and run a hand through his hair.

He closes his eyes and relaxes at my touch. I just look at him and stare.

He opens his eyes and they meet mine. My hands stop moving and I am in a trance like always.

The man I love. The man of my dreams. The man that owns my heart! My one and only!

I just stare and stare. All the thoughts leave my mind.

There is only one emotion flowing through my body and my veins and I know that as I am looking into his eyes, that he is feeling the same.

Just... Love.

I want to take his hand and just walk away from everything.

Just us both... Hand in hand... Against the world... He takes my hand and brings it to his lips.

His tender lips feel soft against mine. He doesn't kiss, but just... rubs my fingers against his lips and then places a kiss against my ring finger.

He looks back into my eyes with this overwhelming emotion and I feel like my heart is flooding with love for this man.

"You love me." He chuckles at my words and it looks like he is really amused by them.+

"Yeah, I do." His admits holding my hand and runs this thumb over the back of my hand.

That magic when we both are together comes and we just stare at each other.

The fear of what might happen if he leaves after this week looming in the back of my head and eating me.

The knock on the door causes me to look away and stand up from the table immediately.

"Come in." He says as he sips his coffee.

"I wanted to discuss with you about the house you wanted to rent in LA and about your facilitation in the LA office."

Micheal says coming in. He brings his laptop along with him and looks up at Dalton once he bears the table.

His gaze shifts to me who is standing beside his boss.

"Clara." He gives me a nod acknowledging my presence.

He looks back and forth between me and Dalton!!!!!!

They are going to discuss about Dalton accommodation and him moving to LA. I can't hear this.

This is pure torture. This will only make it more real for me.

He is not going to leave. That's it! I won't allow him to!

"You knew all along that his ex-girlfriend is me?" I ask him even though I know the answer to it.

He stutters and opens and closes his mouth like a fish. "I-I..." He looks at Dalton for help.

"He knew, Cara." Dalton says from beside me. I look at him angrily.

"Don't call me that ex-boyfriend!" I nearly yell and turn back to Micheal who is now looking at me with wide eyes, probably in shock that I just yelled at his boss and my boss.

He immediately composes himself. I sigh and look back at Dalton. "I am going home." I am angry.

"Cara Mia." I hear him call as I open the door. I turn back and find him standing near his chair, ready to follow me out.

"Don't!" He moves to come to me. "Seriously, don't.

Go to LA. I don't care!" I say as the door closes and walk to my cabin.

Angrily, I pack all my stuff and come out of the building.

I think about how I reacted. Fu**ck! I should not be thinking about what happened.

I should think about what I have to do to get him to stay.

Urgh! Dalton! How can I get you to stay?! He clearly stated that he made up his mind! Fuc***k!

My mind is all over the place. What should I do? Today is too much.

I have to face my boyfriend who wants to leave me because he loves me.

How fuc***ked up is that?! I had to face the reality that he is actually not letting me change his mind.

He is being stubborn. I don't even know what to do to make him stay.

This whole time his assistant, Micheal knew that I was his ex-girlfriend. This is crazy.

I just want to go home and make a plan for tomorrow.

I have only five more days. I was about to call a taxi when my mind suddenly strikes a plan.

I should be going home tonight. But not Mom's. A devilish smile traces my lips.

later

"Cara, what are you doing here?" He looks at me in shock.

Of course he would be. I give him an innocent smile.

I am in his house and in his bed in his shirt and my pyjama short.

I lay there in the bed pretending to read a book as he came in to find me there.

"Oh, hi, Baby." He looks like he is still in shock. "I am just reading a book."

I hold it up for him to see. He has already taken off his coat and is only in his white shirt and black pants.

He. Looks. HOT! Okay, concentrate! You should win this! He comes and stands beside me.

"You know what I am asking." His hands are on his hips.

I wrap my hand around his wrist and pull him down.

He sits beside me. He is so close to me. He looks tired.

Since he is wrapping things here, he has been busy the whole day.

"You want me to leave?" he opens his mouth to answer my question, but I cut him off.

I look outside and it's dark. "Now?" I look back at him putting on my most innocent face.

"It's dark outside." It is only 8PM. "You are going to throw me out at-"

"Okay. That's it." He stands up. I am still holding his wrist. "I know what you are doing."

"You do?"

"Yeah." He nods his head. "I know when you get cheeky and that innocent look, you are up for something."

He runs a hand through his hair. "It's not going to work."

"But, I am not doing anything, Baby. I am just reading a book.

" I hold it up again. I go back to reading it, at least pretending to read it.

He sighs. "Fine. Let's play it your way."

I give him a shrug and he goes into the bathroom.

I smile to myself as I flip the pages of the book. I took a cab and came to his house, punched in the password.

Now I remember that the password is the date we met, the date and month.

My heart warms at that. I come in and cook him food and prepare everything making it seem like the time when we were together.

That's the plan. To spend time with him like the old times.

Old, sweet times. Have him see how stupid his idea of leaving is.

He comes out of the bathroom in his sweat pants and t-shirt.

No boxers? He looks like my Dalton. "Are we going to keep it PG-13 today?" I ask as I look at him. He chuckles and shakes his head.

"I will be sleeping in the guest room, Cara." He brushes his hair looking in the mirror as he says that. I close the book and put it aside.

"Why?" I slid on the bed and roll around. The shirt comes up near my waist and I lay on my front.

"You don't want to sleep here, in bed with me?" He just stares at me.

From my legs to my thighs to my ass to my waist, to my raised shirt, to my face, to my lips and meeting my eyes.

"Come here, Baby." I call him in the voice I do when I want to cuddle with him.

He comes to me like a spell is cast on him.

I extend my arm as I say that. He walks to the bed and I give him a smile as I get on my knees on the bed.

He comes to me pulls my hair out of my face and it felt so good.

I missed this! His touch! He used to do it all the time!

I close my eyes and savour the moment, the fear that this might not happen after a month suddenly jumps in my mind.

I immediately open my eyes just to look at him, to see that he is here.

Without letting another second go to waste, I crash my lips to his.

He meets mine half way. There is love, passion, belongingness, trust and everything in the kiss.

I kiss him fiercely. I show him how I missed him, but he takes over.

I can tell he missed me so much. It must have been hell for him to see me every day and not recognize him.

My lips suck on his and our tongues are dancing in rhythm. Fu**ck!

"I missed you." I confess as we pull out of the kiss for a second, his lips are back on mine.

"Not as much as I did." He kisses me back with such fierceness. I can feel his emotions in the kiss.

I put my legs around his waist and he lays me on the bed.

My fingers grasp his hair and I let him take control.

I want him to devour me. I am his! He is mine! His hands are round my waist.

He is hugging me close to his body. After what seems like an hour, we pull away to catch our breath.

We are breathing hard. My heart is hammering against my chest.

Oh my God! This happened! This really happened!

He keeps kissing my jaw and goes to my neck.

"You smell like me." I am wearing his shirt and I used his soap when I showered before he came.

"I know you like it." He keeps kissing my neck and starts sucking on it.

My hands are on his head. I moan and let him do as he pleases with me.

"I love it." He confesses and goes back to sucking my neck.

"Dalton!" I moan his name. He slowly stops sucking and just puts his head in the crook of my neck, just laying there, hugging me.

I put my arms around him. He is careful to not put his weight on me as he lays there. He is on top of me.

It's back to reality time. Tears nearly pool my eyes.

It's just that... This kiss... It brought back everything.

We just lay there in silence as I cradle his head like I am holding a baby.

I lean down and kiss his forehead holding his hair back.

His legs are covering mine. Our breathing slows down and I just want to kiss him more. I want to feel his lips on mine more.

He moves and gets up. No! I don't want to go back to reality!

I hold out both my hands wanting him to come back in my arms.

"That's tempting, Cara." He holds one of my hands and pulls me up making me stand.

He leans down still holding my hand and whispers.

"You are like a drug, you know that?" He asks before kissing my cheek.

And you are mine.

"I know." He says and I look at him in surprise. He chuckles.

"You said that out loud." I quickly cover my mouth and he laughs.

And Damn! That's the sexiest thing ever! "Thank you." He smiles. "Is my smile sexy too?"

Did I speak out again? "No, it's not." I look away. Blush creeps out on my cheeks. "You are so cheeky. Urgh!" I sigh.

"Only with you. Come, let's have dinner." He pulls me along with him to the dining room.

He looks at me once he sees the setting there. "You did all this?"

"Yes."

"But-"

I take both of his hands into mine. He turns to me.

"I know you decided to leave after a week." I can't even say those words.

Saying them out loud only makes them more real and that's breaking my heart thinking that he might not be here.

I won't let that happen. "But, these remaining days, I want to stay here, with you." I look straight into his eyes as I say that. "Please."

"Okay." I grin and get on my tippy-toes to kiss him.

We have dinner. Both sitting beside each other. His hands are on my thighs.

This takes me back to the time, we sat in his balcony with me in his shirt and his hand placed on my thigh just like now.

He wouldn't let go even when I tell him. My heart fluttered and I was like a teenage girl who is sitting beside her crush.

"Why are you smiling?" He asks as he eats his food.

I shake my head. I don't even realise that I am smiling.

"Tell me." He urges. I look up at him and bite my lip feeling shy. "You are blushing? Now I want to know."

He puts his spoon down and turns to me completely.

He runs his fingers on my thigh where it feels ticklish. I giggle.

"I was thinking of the time when I first slept in your house."

He looks like he is going down the memory lane. "I remember.

You were wearing my shirt and leaning on that balcony." He points to the one behind me.

"That's when it all started, officially though." He adds.

That's true! So many wonderful memories.

The remaining of the dinner just goes by. I don't bring the top of him leaving anymore.

I don't want to. It's haunting. Once we are done, I walk to his room, waiting for him to follow, but he stops outside the bedroom. I look at him in confusion.

"Good night, Clara. I will sleep in the guest bedroom." He is about to turn around.

"No, stop!" Guest bedroom?! "Why?"

He just shrugs. I go to him. Come on, Baby! You were so close, now don't go away! "It's better this way."

"For whom?" I ask immediately. "For whom is it better?"

"Clara-"

"Don't!" I take his hand and pull him into the bedroom. "

We are sleeping here. I don't care what your reasons are.

Sleeping in the same bed with me wouldn't kill you."

I look at him. "Or me. Besides, if you are worrying that something might happen between us, don't worry.

I am up for it." I give him a teasing smile. "I missed you.

" I push him on the bed. "Oh, you giant man!" He chuckles at me.

"That's true though. I can never control myself around you."

He pulls me in. "But, no. We won't be doing anything today."

I pout. "Sleep." He snuggles me in and pulls the blanket over us.

I lay comfortably in his arms. His arms. My true home.

Out legs are entwined. I feel warm. We lay there in each other warmth. But the threat is looming in my mind.

"I can't live without you." I confess. "I can't so it." Tears are starting to pool my eyes. I don't know how to change his mind.

"Clara." He calls my name. His hand is smoothening my hair.

"You seem to be calling me Clara these days." He is calling me that more after the memory loss.

"You don't like that?"

"I don't know. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don't. I feel like you are talking to the memory loo version of me when you call me that. I am jealous of that." He chuckles.

"You are jealous of yourself? Cara, only you can say that."

"Well you make me say things like that." I look up at him.

"I love you in any way you come." He places a kiss on my forehead as he tightens his hold around me, but not too much. We stay silent for a few seconds.

"Do you have to go?" I may be asking him this question the hundredth time. Every time I ask him, I hope that he will say no. But he doesn't.

"I do."

I close my eyes stopping the tears from falling. You stupid!

"I am." He says. I look at him. "You said it out loud."

He clarifies. "Sleep, Cara Mia." We snuggle closer, if that is even possible.

My ear is against his heart. I fall asleep listening to his heartbeat.

The next day, we both come to the office together.

I try everything to make him jealous. He in fact gets angry and nearly yells at Micheal, because he is the person I flirted with.

I feel bad for him. The whole day just went by with no progress whatsoever.

Like he said, "I will be provoked till this week ends.

" "Play all the games you want to play with me." But I can tell that it is going to last only till this weekend.

After the day ends, we both come home and I snuggle into his arms.

He doesn't protest. Not that he protested yesterday.

We lay there in his bed, but sleep doesn't come to me.

There is this feeling... That I can't describe. I hold on to him tight.

He places a kiss on my forehead. I can't fall asleep. I think about what to do yesterday.

That's when I remember, tomorrow is Dalton's mother's death anniversary.

My heart drops. He will not be coming to the office tomorrow.

I need to be here for him. No more plans for tomorrow.

Oh Dalton!

                                          Episode 21

"Mommy, are we going to the park today?" The little boy playing in the back seat asks.

His mother looks back at him with a smile. His mommy is the most beautiful woman in the world.

"We are sweetie. Are you excited?" She asks. His father is in the driving seat. He looks at the boy from the mirror.

"I am." The little boy giggles and looks out the window to see if they have reached yet.

"He is growing up so fast." The mother says to his father.

"He is." His father's hand is on his mother's. He doesn't understand why his father eats his mother's face sometimes. That's gross.

"Daddy." The little boy calls.

"Yes Buddy."

"Why do you eat Mommy's face?" Both his parent's burst out laughing.

Did he say something funny? They share a look and his mother blushes.

"Because, I love your mother." He brings her hand to his lips to kiss.

"She is the most beautiful woman." His father says.

"I love Mommy too."

"Aww... Mommy loves you too, Sweetie." His mother reaches out and tickles him.

The little boy giggles. "You are Mommy's favourite boy."

"What about me?" The father asks.

"No, Daddy. I am Mommy's favourite!" The Little Boy claps in excitement.

His Mommy loves him the more. His mother laughs.

Did he make his mother laugh? He is proud that his mother loves him and he made his mother laugh.

He giggles again letting out the sound his parents love to hear.

He wants to play with his mother and father all day today.

Placing the white flowers on her grave, I stare at her headstone.

Evangeline Bryant, Beloved wife and Loving mother.

The words engraved on the stone stare back at me.

It is always like a punch in the gut. It's something I can get used to.

I don't remember how many times I wished she was alive, I still do, just like I wish my father was alive.

But it's something beyond my control. Something I can't change.

I have come to terms with it a long time ago. The memory of the time my father informed of her death comes back to me.

I just came from school, a very bad day already, he takes me to hospital without another word and she was in the hospital bed with tubes attached to her.

Just like Clara was when she met with the accident.

I was scared for the first time in my life, to see my mother like that.

"Mom." I rush to her to hold her hand. She is sleeping.

I link my fingers with hers and she opens her eyes. A small smile graces her lips.

My father comes to her side in seconds.

"Baby, I will call the doctor, stay awake." He presses a button beside the bed and pushes open the door quickly to call a doctor.

"I love you, My Sweet Boy." Her voice is barely a whisper.

"I love you, Mom." I want to hug her. But there are so many wires attached to her. She smiles back at me.

The doctors come rushing into the room. A nurse escorts me out and asks me to wait there.

I see my mother holding my father's hand as they share a few words.

"Sir, please. You have to wait outside." The doctor tells my father.

I watch them literally pushing him out to operate on mother.

The door closes and we both wait outside. My father holds me trying not to break down.

He loves mom very much. Tears slide down both of my cheeks. I don't like seeing mom like this. It was scary.

By that night, the Doctor tells us the news of mom passing away and my father broke down. So much changed that day.

I don't want to see Clara like that. I don't want to lose Clara like that.

She has to live. She has to live her full life, even if it's not with me.

"Dalton." Her soft voice calls me and I look at her in surprise.

I came here without her. She was sleeping when I came out.

It's still very early in the morning. She walks to me with open arms and I don't waste a minute to rush into them.

We came here together last year. She held me just like today. "

Why didn't you wake me up?" She asks pulling away.

"Clara." I pull her to my side and hold her close. My mother would be so happy to see us together.

Clara places the flowers she brought on the grave and leans her head against me.

She knows everything about me. From the time my mother dies to how I lived through the years till I met her.

When mother passed away, everything changed. Everything.

My father and I have become distant. He immersed himself in work.

Shortly I entered my teenage and without anyone's support, it was hard.

I had gotten into fights almost every other day. Father has to come meet the Principal at least once a month.

He got so immersed in work that we started spending less time together.

He was there for me and I was there for him, but not like before.

Once I completed school, I had no interest in running the company.

I just wanted to leave everything and runaway and that's what I did.

I left the house and town that reminded me too much of my mother.

Not knowing on how to deal with the loss of mother at such a young age surely had an impact on me for a long time.

I wanted to get away from the pain and I did. I chose to go into army.

The rigorous training nearly showed me a way to deal with my feelings.

It strangely helped me calm down. It is a way of letting out. I stayed in touch with Dad, he did come and visit me a few times, but it's not the same.

For nearly ten years I was away from him. Suddenly one day, I get a call that he is unwell.

Coming home to find my father with only number of days to live is not something I was looking forward to.

He was diagnosed with Cancer. It ate him out. He gave everything to me, but I just wanted him to stay alive.

We sure grew apart, but after his death, nothing seemed to touch me.

Nothing. I felt nothing. Life is just... passing. I had lost interest in everything.

Shortly after father's death, my grandmother passed away.

Everyone I come close to, seems to meet a tragic end.

That's when I realized what a curse I was. It is all my fault maybe. I had no interest in having friends or getting close to anyone.

I just wanted to run my father's company. There was no other motive or no other plan... till I met her.

She brought everything back with her. Love, family... Hope.

Life seemed to be the best with her. Her smile brightens my day.

Waking up to her is the only thing I wanted in life. I would do anything to keep her close.

I look at her and think of what I planned to do tonight.

Placing a kiss on the crown of her head I look down into her eyes.

"Spend the whole day with me." She smiles as I say that.

"I would love to."

I am eager to spend the whole day with her. "I will inform William about us.

He will take care of my schedule and you don't need to worry about your work today."

"Okay."

"Let's go." I say and we both leave hand in hand. I take one last look at my parent's graves. "Goodbye, Mother, Father."

"Cara." She looks up from her plate. We are having breakfast in the place we went on a first date.

"Hmm." She smiles. Oh, how I would love to kiss her right now!

"Why did you hide yourself with the menu card that day?"

I wanted to know for a long time, but more than that I just want to see her blush.

And blush she does. Her whole face turns red.

"not to show my face to you, remember?" Now that I think about it, I did. "You were so grumpy!" She scowls at me.

"I am sorry, Cara." I hold her hand and kiss the back of it.

"It's okay, Baby." She gives me her lovely smile. "You were also Sweet, Charming-"

"Sexy, Hot and oh-Handsome like you say." I say and she blushes at my words. "

Will you come to the Zoo with me?" I used to go to the Zoo with my parents, Clara knows it too. We went there as our second date.

"Of course." She leans down and kisses my cheek.

"Anywhere with you." Her lips fall on mine and I don't hold back.

Our kiss is brief as a waiter comes to serve our food. She blushes and goes back to eating.

She is going to be the death of me. I just stare at her as I think of what I planned on doing tonight.

We finished our breakfast and go to zoo. I don't leave her hand and she doesn't look like she minds it.

We waltz through the zoo. I think of all the memories this place holds.

My parents and me, Clara... I remember giving her a hickey that day when we planned to come here.

I remember how red she turned that day. A smile comes on to my lips as I think about it.

"Why are you smiling?" She asks, she herself smiling. I shake my head. "Tell me." We stop to sit on a bench nearby.

"I was just remembering the first time we came here and the whole day.

I remember how you woke up in my arms that day, just like today.

I remember how I gave you a hickey that day." She slaps my chest lightly while blushing. "I remember how red you turned just like now."

"Dalton!" She hides her face in my chest. I kiss the crown of her neck. My girl! Cara Mia! My arms are around her.

After the spending the whole day together, we reach home and she goes into the bathroom to freshen up.

My heart clenches as I think about what I have to do in a few hours.

She looks so happy today, for spending the whole day together.

She has been trying so hard to get me to stay since the past two days.

She flirted with William and some guy from the financial department yesterday to get me to react.

I don't want to see her flirt with others it's making me jealous and the longer I stay with her, the more I don't want to leave.

I want to just stay and tie her to me. But I don't want to be that curse to her.

I don't want my curse to eat her out.

I only kill the people that get close to me. They all end up buried six feet under the ground.

I don't want that for her. I can't bear the thought of that happening to her.

No! Not to Clara! I don't want to lose another person that I love. I can't bear that and I can't live with it if it's Clara.

Picking my phone, I call William's number. He picks up after two rings.

"Did you get everything ready as I said?"

"Yes, Dalton. The plane will be waiting for you midnight.

I informed the LA office about your arrival. They will set everything ready for tomorrow."

"Okay." I cut the call.

I have to do this. I have to leave before I give in to Clara.

I want to stay close to her. I want to! But I should not. So, I have to leave tonight when she is sleeping.

I look at a picture of my mother, father and me placed beside the bedside table.

What should I do mother?! She comes out of the bathroom wearing my shirt.

Her hair is let down and she looks every bit home.

My home. How am I supposed to live without home?!

She smiles as she comes to me. Should I take her with me? What's the point in leaving then?!1l

"Hey." She slips into bed. My shirt is drowning her like always.

I want to hold her. I just have to. I pull her close to me and lay my head in her lap.

Her hands are in my hair. My hands are around her waist. "Dalton." She whispers and my resolve breaks.

Tears start forming in my eyes. Fuck! This is the end. At least she will live.

"Baby." She lifts my head up. "Are you crying?" She holds my face in her hands delicately. "

No. I am right here. Everything will be alright. Okay?" She wipes them away.

Oh Clara! "Why am I such a curse?"

"Stop saying that! You are not!" She nearly shouts angrily.

"They are died. My mother, father and grandmother."

"It's not your fault, Baby. You still have us. You have me and-and your grandfather."

"Yeah and I will cause you all to die if I stick around."

"Stop it! Please. You don't. You are the reason we are holding up to live.

Who would your grandfather have if you leave?! I can't live without you!"

"Clara." I hug her again.

I hug her tightly, very tightly, but she didn't complain. She fell asleep somewhere in the middle of the night.

"I don't want to leave." She is deeply in sleep as I whisper those words to myself.

But I have to. "I can't live without you." But you have to live.

This is for the best. I lean down and kiss her forehead, cheeks and lips.

I just stare at her taking my time to admire her. I might not get this chance again.

Looking at her is only making it all the more difficult to leave.

My phone vibrates. It's a message from William. It's time. I have to go.

A heavy pain settles in my heart. I don't want to leave.

"I love you, Cara Mia." Leaning down I place a kiss on her forehead.

She smiles in her sleep and moves still asleep. Placing the letter I wrote for her beside her, I get up slowly, trying not to wake her up.

Her immediate feeling of not being in her arms makes me feel empty.

I take the bag I packed and look at her as I leave the room.

I have to do this. For you. I am sorry, Cara Mia.

With that I leave the room. If I stay any longer, I might change my mind and stay here.

This is so painful. How can I live without her?!

I board my private plane once I reach the airport.

This is it! I have to so this! I tell myself. I look out the window as.

My vision blurs from tears. I am bound to live this life alone.

Without Clara. The thought painfully fills me. My heart is heavy.

Everything changes from today. Everything. Without her, life is not going to make sense.

But she should live, she should live happily and she would if I am not in her life.

I am sorry, Clara. I am so sorry, Cara Mia.

Checkout in the next episodes